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Why Men Love Bitches

July 21, 2015

(Disclaimer: I do not own this excellent idea or the quotes below)

After reading Sherry Argov’s controversially title book: I learned to grow a spine and realized that bad boys are not the way to go and my life was changed forever. I recommend that my girlfriends read: “Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl – A Woman’s Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship. “

I complied a series of quotes from the book which really resonated with me. (Source: http://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/2572759-why-men-love-bitches-from-doormat-to-dreamgirl—a-woman-s-guide-to-hol)

I covered the premise of the story, and subjects like: confidence, communication, control and the conlcusion of this book in this series of quotes from the book: “Why Men Love Bitches”.

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Premise:

“When a woman is secure with herself, she isn’t afraid to define herself and defy public opinion. She has her own look. Her own style. Her own charisma. Her own brand of charm. A man wants something he doesn’t see every day. Not in terms of a redhead versus a blonde. He wants the rare woman who can think for herself.”

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“The most attractive quality of all is dignity.”

“A beautiful woman can make herself

look ugly in the eyes of a man if she is very insecure.”

“Most women are starving to receive something from a man that they need to give to themselves”

“If you allow your rhythm to be interrupted, you’ll create a void. Then to replace what you give up, you’ll start to expect and need more from your partner.”

“Regardless of how pretty a woman is, looks alone will not sustain his respect. Appearance may pull him in, but it is your independence that will keep him turned on.”

“Success in love isn’t about looks, it’s about attitude.”

“when a woman is too nice and will jump through hoops: It invites bad behavior.”

“The nice girl loses an important protective mechanism when she assumes that life is fair, or that Prince Charming will always protect her. The smart fox is not governed by wishful thinking or the hope of a fantasy outcome, like Cinderella. Despite appearances, she trusts herself to watch her OWN back instead of giving a man the responsibility of doing it for her.”

“When you meet someone who is truly great, he makes you believe you can be great, too. This is the kind of relationship you want, and it’s the only kind of relationship worth having.”

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Confidence:

“It is your attitude about yourself that a man will adopt.”

“When you live life with him or without him, that is when he will accept and value you for who you are.”

“Certainly, the average fashion magazine gives women ridiculous relationship advice that makes it easy to understand why women are so eager to overcompensate: “Play hard to get, then cook him a four-course meal … bake him Valentine’s cookies with exotic sprinkles shipped from Malaysia (just like Martha Stewart). Don’t forget the little doilies and the organic strawberries that you drove two hours to get. Then serve it all to him on the second date, wearing a black lace nightie.” And what is this a recipe for? Disaster.”

“The more independent you are of him, the more interested he will be.” He must feel that you choose to be with him, not that you need to be with him.”

“Men don’t respond to words. What they respond to is “no contact”.”

“Before sex, a man isn’t thinking clearly and a woman is thinking clearly. After sex, it reverses. The man is thinking clearly and a woman isn’t.”

“if the sex was too easy to get, it was not that great.”

“She doesn’t realize that she becomes so involved in him that she loses herself, and in the process, she risks losing him as well.”

“Don’t let the advertisements on TV be your guide. The woman who sustains a man’s interest is not the one who feels confident because of a particular miniskirt, a belly ring, or a black dress with plunging neckline. A bitch doesn’t rely on these things to feel good about herself. She relies on who she is as a woman.”

“It isn’t about looks; gorgeous women get dumped every day.”

5confidence

“One

man’s “ugly” is another man’s “beautiful.”

“Sex appeal is 50% what you’ve got, and 50% what people think you’ve got.” —SOPHIA LOREN”

“He should accept me as I am!” says the woman who is too nice.

Accept you? Oh no, sister. Slap yourself. He should want you

madly. Acceptance has nothing to do with it. He accepts a

doormat. But he desires his dreamgirl.”

“The bitch does not stop moving to her own rhythm. This, in and of itself, prevents her from becoming off-balance like a nice girl who abandons her routine.”

7elegntconfidence

“The bitch isn’t afraid to be different, which is why she won’t be a “booty call” or a pearl on a long string of pearls. She won’t be a man’s late-night convenience. She won’t be doing lap dances. She won’t be afraid to turn thirty or forty years old. At any age, this woman will feel like a “prize.” She won’t be defined by the media’s perception of aging; she won’t be made to feel like detective livestock because she is no longer a teenager. Married, single, or divorced, this woman feels good about herself.”

quoteaddict

Communication:

“Always give the appearance that he has plenty of space. It gets him to drop his guard.”

“Men control the world, but women control the men.”

“You can get away with saying much more with humor than you can with a straight face”

“When you nag, you become the problem, an he deals with it by turning you out, but when you dont nag, he deals with the problem.”

“If you can’t convince ’em, confuse ’em.”

“correcting the situation or by not allowing the person to have access to you.”

“Because of his hormones, he only has three emotions: crabby, hungry, horny.”

“It’s true that men say, “A man’s love comes from his stomach”. But there’s nothing in this statement that requires you to cook the food before it ends up in his stomach.”

“When you tell a man how you feel, most of the time he doesn’t understand what you’re talking about. You’ll probably just confuse and frustrate him.”

“Keeping it short and to the point is essential, otherwise he won’t hear a single word.”

“Expressing yourself when he takes for granted doesn’t work.”

“Forcing him to talk about feelings all the time will not only make you seem needy, it will eventually make him lose respect. And when he loses respect, he’ll pay even less attention to your feelings.”

“position without nagging or repeating yourself several times. If he asks, “Is something wrong?” take a breath and respond calmly. “Yes, something is wrong, but I’d like to talk about it later. I really don’t want to talk about it now.”

“Expressing your feelings constantly is like pleading. It comes across as needy rather than dignified.”

“He perceives an emotional woman as more of a pushover.”

“If you appear weak, people take advantage of you.”

“If you want to control your emotions, you have to control your thoughts.”

“Standing up for yourself doesn’t always involve verbal confrontation. Sometimes it’s about not wasting energy on people who are negative.”

1control

Control:

“Instead of working so hard to please him, work harder to please yourself…because ultimately, this is what will truly please him.”

“If she’s too predictable because you talk about the relationship all the time instead of going out and having one, he’ll get bored quickly.”

“It is important to be able to do stuff alone and not have her give you a hard time about it.”

“If you smother him, he’ll go into defense mode and look for an escape route to protect his freedom.”

2control

“when something is right, it will feel easier and much more effortless”

“In a relationship of any kind, if one person feels the other person isn’t bringing anything to the table, he or she will begin to disrespect that person.”

“It becomes a burden if you lean on him too much. He is only human, and he has his own problems. Show him that you’ll be an equal partner, which means that you also have something to contribute.”

“If you are nice, but you give of yourself with strings attached, the

demand for reciprocity will send him several steps backward.”

“He’ll do what you like just long enough to get what he wants.”

“Whenever a woman requires too many things from a man, he’ll resent it. Let him give what he wants to give freely; then observe who he is.”

“When a woman acts as though she’s capable of everything, she gets stuck doing everything.”

“The woman who is too nice senses that he “needs her” and she runs to his aid like a Red Cross rescue missionary. And she gives—blindly.”

When a nice girl overcompensates,

her behavior says, “What I have to offer isn’t enough,

and who I am isn’t enough.”

Truly powerful people don’t explain why they want respect. They simply don’t engage someone who doesn’t give it to them.”

“For a woman the objective is often a committed relationship also known as the destination. For a men roadtrip on the way to the destination is often the more fun.”

“Talking about feelings to a man will feel like work. When he’s with a woman, he wants it to feel like fun.”

“The nice girl makes the mistake of being available all the time.”

“If a man has to wait before he sleeps with a woman, he’ll not only perceive her as more beautiful, he’ll also take time to appreciate who she is.”

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“If you chase him in a black nightie, first he’ll have sex with you . . .

and then he’ll run.”

“She knows what she wants but won’t compromise herself to get it. But she’s feminine, like “Steel Magnolia” — flowery on the outside, steel on the inside. She uses this very femininity to her own advantage. It isn’t that she takes undue advantage of men, because she plays fair. She has one thing the nice girl doesn’t: a presence of mind because she isn’t swept away by a romantic fantasy. This presence of mind enables her to wield her power when it is necessary.”

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Consequences:

“There is no way to hold your own in a relationship and simultaneously accept rude behavior.”

“One of the things women have to get out of their mindset is the notion of what a bitch is. A bitch is nice. She’s sweet as a Georgia peach. She smiles and she is feminine. She just doesn’t make decisions based on the fear of losing a man.”

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“Many women are so gripped with fear over the loss of a man that they think of him constantly.”

“If he still isn’t giving you what you want, the question to ask yourself is whether you really want him.”

“If a relationship is on-and-off within the first year, that’s an immediate sign you are wasting your time.”

UncondiTional love is a beauTiful Thing. JusT be sure To

give iT after your conditions have been meT :P”

“Many people lack the basic equipment to be in a relationship and there’s nothing you can do to change it. You can’t take a skunk and dip it in perfume and hope it becomes a puppy. Eventually, the perfume will wear off and you’ll still have a skunk on your hands.”

“Familiarity breeds contempt and predictability breeds boredom.”

“It isn’t about the looks; gorgeous women get dumped every day. It isn’t about intelligence. Women of all types, from brilliant women to women with the IQ equivalent of plant life, pull it off every day. It’s about mystery and learning how to create intrigue.”

“People use the excuse of money, time, being away from the kids to stop being intimate or romantic. It’s really important to keep the passion.”

“If a man isn’t being nice when you’re out, all you have to do is remain polite and then go home early.”

3consequence

“The best advice I ever heard is, don’t take anyone else’s advice.” There’s power in this because it puts you in the conductor’s seat, right at “the controls” in your life. It doesn’t mean you should stop seeking information or outside input, it just means that you’re the one driving. You choose your own destination.”

“The bitch is an empowered woman who derives tremendous strength from the ability to be an independent thinker, particularly in a world that still teaches women how to be self-abnegating. This woman doesn’t live someone else’s standards, only her own.”

“Be an independent thinker at all times, and ignore anyone who attempts to define you in a limiting way.”

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Conclusion:

“The bitch is very nice. She is as sweet as a Georgia peach. But inside every sweet peach is a strong pit. And this means she won’t explain the obvious when a man is disrespectful.”

“A girlfriend went on a couple of dates with a guy who criticized the color of her nail polish. She said, “The suggestion department is closed for the evening, but fax your idea tomorrow and we’ll file it right over there in the suggestion box.” (Then she pointed to the kitchen trash.)”

“A dreamgirl, on the other hand, won’t kill herself to impress anyone.”

“Bitch (noun): A woman who won’t bang her head against the wall obsessing over someone else’s opinion – be it a man or anyone else in her life. She understands that if someone does not approve of her, it’s just one person’s opinion; therefore, it’s of no real importance. She doesn’t try to live up to anyone else’s standards – only her own. Because of this, she relates to a man very differently.”

“That’s the big picture, your happiness. And health. You should never care what a man thinks of you — until he demonstrates to you that he cares about making you happy. If he isn’t trying to make you happy, then send him back from “whence” he came because winning him over will have no benefit. At the end of the day, happiness, joy…and yes…your emotional stability…those comprise the only measuring stick you really need to have.”

“When it comes to believing in yourself, put your eye on the mark and don’t blink. If you have a goal, a dream, or an aspiration…believe in yourself while you are on the way to your destination, and you will have already arrived.”

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“It’s that a bit of irreverence is necessary to have any self-esteem at all. Not irreverence for people, but rather, for what other people think.”“Live by your own rules Move to your rhythm, instead of dancing to the beat of someone else’s drum Decide how you want to be treated Choose what you will or will not tolerate Leave if you don’t get what you want.”

 

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